Reflections

(Shake #8: Take nothing for granted people, seriously)
 I am learning a very tough lesson in my recovery & that may not be the only lesson I'm suppose to be learning, but I'm certainly learning to be grateful for what I have & take nothing for granted.  I am getting a new outlook on what it is to be blessed.  I'm typically a "glass half full" kinda gal, but in my recent past, I've been in more of a "woe is me" mindset.  I've tried hard to shake that feeling & conquer those emotions, but when life as you knew it just stops, it will take a toll on your psyche.  Everyday is a new day, a new way for me to feel ... some days are good & some days are not so good.  Luckily, it's about tit-for-tat; no more bad days than good days.  On days when it's bad, I find myself wallowing in self pity ... looking around realizing that I am at the mercy of other people's kindness & generosity.  Without these selfless people, I would be in worse shape than I am - hence the grateful factor.  My mom has been my non-stop caregiver.  She is 69 years old & keeping up with me & my wild bunch is no easy task for someone in their 20's & 30's, let alone someone knocking on the door of 70.  She has prepared every meal (some of which she didn't have to make from scratch because great friends brought meals by), taken care of my boys, & spoiled Mr. Chyno (& she is NOT a dog person).  She has slept on our couch because we unfortunately do not have a spare bedroom, but not once has she complained.  She is currently battling a possible sinus infection from her allergies, but she keeps truckin' on.  I have no dirty clothes in my house, no dirty linens & my house stays straight.  She is a Godsend & wouldn't know what to do without her.  My husband has worked many long hours & with that, his parents have brought our boys home & on some instances, come & picked them up because my husband had to get to a job site before school starts.  I have always said that I want nothing more than to move to the beach & live the life of a beach bum family - where surfing & fishing & seashell collecting is a part of our regular routine -  but what in the world would I do if something like what we're dealing with were to happen with no family around?  Hmmm, come to think of it, my family doesn't live here but my Mom has come up to be with me ... so I guess she would do that no matter where I lived, huh?  Okay, so that dream can stay alive.  Phew.  Now back to being grateful & taking nothing for granted... walking is something mindless & something that I didn't really think of as a blessing until 2+ weeks ago.  Walking is the difference between an active life & a sedentary life (one that I'm not use to).  To have to quickly jump from being busy all day, everyday; running from one place to another all the time & continuously juggling the schedule of 2 young boys to doing absolutely nothing but elevating a bum foot is a vast & sudden change that will shake anyone (I would think).  However, I am now understanding why people say "you can choose to be happy or choose to be unhappy, but you can't be both" - as for me, I'm choosing to be happy (this is coming from me on a good day, check back on a bad day - haha) ... life has dealt us a hand that isn't easy to play, but it's the hand we're dealt & it's up to us (me & my mind) to make the most of it.  Today, I'm embracing my mandatory elevation/bed-rest & enjoying the ACC Tournament - without having had this injury & surgery, this is not something I'd be able to do.  I'm also able to spend some quality time with my mom ... something else I wouldn't get to do.  I am not getting much sleep or rest due to the pain & medication but because of that, I'm awake to get the morning routines ready for my boys (Wild Kratts @ 6:30 & Timmy Time @ 7) all the while snuggling with them while they eat their bananas & drink milk/juice (something I usually can't do because I'm too busy getting ready & straightening the house before work).  I've also had plenty of time to reflect on my life & I think there will be some changes coming my way.  Some will be immediate & some will be gradual - but one thing is for certain, life is too short to be unhappy & I want to make sure I take nothing (& I mean nothing) for granted. We live one life & one life only ... and if we aren't happy with the results of life's decisions, it's up to us to make different decisions to change that result.  I can't help what happened to me, but I can help the way I deal with it.  Today, is a good day; yesterday, a tough day ... but everyday, is a blessing. Smile folks ... it makes things better. (Sidenote: Today will be a much better day if the Pack brings us a WIN, just sayin')