Friday, March 1, 2013

Thoughts shake the sleep

It's way past my bedtime but yet, I'm still up.  My house is quiet, well... with the exception of my dog licking himself after his bath - thaaaat's nice. I just don't feel drowsy & my mind is working in overdrive.  I have the thoughts of what I wish I had gotten done at work, that I didn't; the thoughts of my boys having safe travels with my parents; thoughts of friends dealing with difficult situations; thoughts of family battling for life; thoughts of having surgery... thoughts, after thoughts, after thoughts. I am alone with my thoughts ... this is never good.  Before I know it, I'll be redecorating our house. But with every few thoughts, the surgery keeps coming back to mind - it's probably because it's tomorrow morning or possibly because my foot throbs/aches in pain every few moments? Whichever it is, it's definitely on my mind. I have been asked a few different times if I'm okay about the surgery or am I nervous about it... and I haven't been, at all.  However, now I'm starting to think about post surgery.  What is THAT going to feel like? I'm going to have hardware in my foot, something my body should naturally try to reject.  Then wear this stinking boot for another 12 weeks - am I going to have to depend on someone to cart me around these next 3 months?  Not nervous about the surgery, but now worried about the aftermath.  I hope my poor husband is ready for this roller coaster. =) I am typically a pretty good patient, but stubbornness can rear its ugly head. (Shake #5: Learning to "let go & let God" is a tough concept, but he has a way of making sure we grasp it) Okay, I'm getting the "you should probably go to sleep" from my sweet hubs & honestly, I think writing this has finally helped me feel drowsy, so I shall take it to bed. Hopefully I'll shake all the thoughts & give my mind a break, because I need some good Zzz's.  (BTW: The parents are home safely with our boys, one thought has now gone to bed).  Goodnight all.

Surgery at 11:15am, 3-1-13 ... ...

1 comment:

  1. I'll be praying for you! I would worry more about AFTER the surgery than the actual surgery, too. It would be hard not to think about that, as a mama! But God will see ya'll through this. You've got a loving, supportive husband and a wonderful family; I think you'll be just fine. Though I know it'll be frustrating at times. :/ Hang in there!!

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